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Missed me?

Journal Entry: Sun Apr 20, 2014, 6:35 PM
Hopefully not, but just to clarify, I had not been in dA since December. Real life got in the way with a collection of situations that put me into a state of depression, and although such situations have not yet disappeared, avoiding dA will do me more harm than good.

Nope, I'm not suicidal now. Nope, I have not drawn anything decent ever since. Nope, I have not been really active in any social network. Perhaps IG, but that's not exactly "social", and even there I post quite irregularly. 

Please, if I owe you something and I haven't contacted you, feel free to tell me via note.

Yes, I'm going to draw and post regularly again. Yes, I will try to resume RPing as I have found it to be the most efficient tool in my stress management thanks to recent experiments IRL.

I did not give any notice of my inactivity because of my blatantly coward and avoidant behaviour, I am sorry. 

I wish you all a happy Esater!

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Schuyler Fisk - Waking Life
  • Watching: House of Cards
  • Playing: V:tM

I was away for like 2 weeks and...

Journal Entry: Mon Dec 9, 2013, 7:36 PM
And I come to find a bunch of mentions (for a journal that was deleted, I think) but it still brightened my day, because my little icon appeared there with a lot of cool artists that people considered inspirations or idols. I MEAN WHAT. ME. NO. WHA-- THANK YOU GUYS.



Also, let me introduce you to some art that deserves to be seen!

<da:thumb id="418785761"/>P I N K by REKE0<da:thumb id="418790060"/>
The Summoning by HighRisk<da:thumb id="354229719"/><da:thumb id="407227606"/><da:thumb id="384245227"/>
Coral Reefs by GraceDoragonandagainSherlockwtf by ArtKosh<da:thumb id="416535110"/>Shaman Challenge speedpaint by bulletproofturtleman

  • Mood: Content
  • Listening to: The Darkness - I believe in a thing called love
  • Watching: Shingeeeekiii no kyoooojinnnnn
  • Playing: to be god

Christmasy spirits are on!

Journal Entry: Sun Nov 17, 2013, 8:59 PM
I mean, geez, guys, since October I keep seeing christmas trees and decors all around town. It makes me want to be in vacations so bad!

Whatever. I live, despite this semester being the best and the worst ever. I don't think I ever had to deal with such an amount of awesomeness and crappiness in all my life. I feel like a happy piece of shit, if that helps explain my condition.

I'm joyfully depressed, disappointed on myself and yet proud of myself for not hating myself for being disappointed on myself-- you get the point. I am a trainwreck. But I'll get over it.

I miss drawing, I'm sorry for owing stuff still, perhaps from last year. I can't take a whole bunch of commissions and still expect to finish them within a few months. Because after the first batch I lose inspiration and everything looks like crap. And I know I'm sucky for that but I STILL LOVE YOU FOR WAITING.
Holidays are coming, which means, the commissions are getting finished.

Next time I'll open up only five or six spots and finish them within a reasonable time. I'M SORRY FOR PROCRASTINATING AND DELAYING STUFF AND BEING A FAILURE. 

Meanwhile, dA is emptier and emptier and I am one of the deviants dying, something I'd rather not have happening. My only way of communicating with the online world while I'm out all day is my phone, thus, instagram and tumblr. I don't check tumblr much but when I submit stuff from IG it automatically updates tumblr so it's a way to show I'm still alive. Check them out if you're out there too.

And, talking about christmas and all, we decided to cage our characters in our icons as self gifts. Because we love pain.


So, would you like christmasy themed commissions? Icons with hats? Chibies inside of present boxes? 

  • Mood: Christmas Spirited
  • Listening to: Good Charlotte
  • Reading: wow so many things I don&#039;t remember
  • Watching: aahh eh.. ahhmmmmmmm nothing...
  • Playing: Candy crush. KILL ME NOW.
  • Eating: Not hungry. I shall starve.
  • Drinking: the tears of my enem--- oh, MY OWN.

Drawing vs Characters

Journal Entry: Tue Oct 22, 2013, 8:36 PM
I found myself showing my little drawing student my old sketches. She kind of recognized Phide and the rest of my characters even though she had only seen them in recent drawings, and I didn't expect her to react surprised when I told her that I had always had this story in my head, back from when I was 13. That made her really happy and I could see in her eyes that she had a story she wanted to tell, too. 

And this is where I wonder... How many of us actually started drawing because we wanted to tell a story, rather than the other way round?

To me, the need to draw comes from seeing my worlds unravel inside my head and, even though with some fear, wanting them to become a little more real, more tangible. The liking of my hand on the pencil was always there, but it was never the main goal to become the most amazing artist in history. Just to be able to portray a glimpse of what I could see and others couldn't. Not even to express feelings or claim social problems, like my mom tells me art "really is". It was just to draw a smile, a pout, a blue eyed scarf. Perhaps to one day turn the little comics behind my notebooks into something people could read (as I wrote them in my own language so nobody could understand them and mock me). 

My question for you, at least for those of you who draw, is: 

Why did you start drawing? They told you you were good and you kept up? It was relaxing? Or did you envision something dreamy and wanted to give reality a try? What was first, the character or the technique? When did you start? You were little, or a teen already? Maybe both technique and characters came at the same time...? 

I don't know! I'm just so curious... :>

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Stacy&#039;s Mom
  • Reading: My death senten--- Uh, just articles.
  • Watching: DexHouseGameof--- oh never mind
  • Playing: Candy crruuuuooouushhhh
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Juice of something like mango. Or tomato.


Journal Entry: Thu Oct 10, 2013, 11:01 PM
Comment here with a deviation's thumb (yours of other deviant's) and I'll add the first 20 or 30 I get, even more if I get time. I'll start with some findings of my own! Expecting some comments!

The Call to Adventure by simplyNAO<da:thumb id="403243149"/>Mom Does Not Approve by dcrisisbeta<da:thumb id="399101325"/>Goddess of all Sages by onone-chanDragon by SmartGemThe Wolverine - Think of Me As Your Bodyguard by Renny08The queens of chess/ Reinas de ajedrez by valececilia22the mind keeper by RyuuLenCash Concept by PurpleblockNamine by Abigail-ScottKUROSHITSUJI: Tea Time! by Alicere:Of:Protection:And:Fools:Sunny: by Ayme-KugurumiCLOSED [Auc-dopts] Ice Cream Girls by dev-lish  HAKONIWA TOKICHI by terracchiCapital city ZYENA by CaptainPOZOLJoy by UnwakenedSheepcolorful geeky MARLENE by CaptainPOZOL<da:thumb id="373180253"/>Blood Stained face by LilRwarRequest : Kizuna OC by Selras

  • Mood: Satisfied
  • Listening to: Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
  • Reading: My class notes
  • Watching: My class notes dance before me
  • Playing: To understand my handwritting
  • Eating: nails
  • Drinking: the blood of the enemies

This will not stay put

Journal Entry: Thu Oct 10, 2013, 12:53 PM
The contents of this journal will be temporally removed. I promise to bring them back eventually, sorry for the inconvenience and the curiosity it may arise! D8 Your comments, though, they've helped me a lot and I've been reassured about the matter. Thanks so much, guys, you're the best!

here, have a phil wall. Oh My Phil!


  • Mood: Repulsed
  • Listening to: Planes flying above me
  • Reading: Accusatory messages
  • Watching: Chocolate pudding melt.
  • Playing: Candy Crush
  • Eating: Chocolate pudding
  • Drinking: Chocolate pudding, a bit more melted


Journal Entry: Tue Oct 8, 2013, 2:07 PM
More than a month without a journal? Let's fix this and spam people.
So I've been absent, perhaps you haven't even noticed which is good. Life is not what it used to be. Better? Worse? I couldn't really tell. It's different and it sometimes makes me want to puke, sometimes makes me want it to stay like that forever. Maybe that last thing's the pool and the turkish bath. Yeah, I bet it's that. 

I've been thinking of holding a halloweenish contest for a while and I hoped that, being october, I'd finally get it coming around, but heh. I'm kind of tied up with life. I can't remember the last time I was so... so... not stressed, but worn out. Maybe I'll leave it for christmas and melt it with my "make your own srs character contest" idea. That may work. Yeah. Yeah..... 

I hardly draw anymore, not even able to post Dark Dawn regularly. If you want to see the few doodles I spit from my dying being, follow my tumblr. They're seriously not worth putting here. They're just crappy instagram pictures. You could follow my instagram too. I'm leaglem there, and leadles in tumblr. Too tired to add links.

That being said, hope you'll enjoy halloween as this is probably my last journal in a good while. I hope I make it through the next months. 8D;

I'll try to draw more octopi. It's october anyway. Though, the eight (octo) month was august. What is wrong with the calendar. September (seven) is the ninth, november is the 11th. wth, people. wth. Learn to count and use prefixes accordingly.

  • Mood: Agony
  • Listening to: Vienna Teng
  • Reading: Biophysics articles
  • Playing: Candy Crush

Watermelon is diuretic

Journal Entry: Wed Sep 4, 2013, 7:11 PM
Don't dare eat half a watermelon and still expect you can stay a whole hour without visiting the restroom. A friendly advise from an apparently stupid octopus.

Also, guys, I'm twitching in pure joy and fulfillment as I read through the comments you left in my last poll. I DID SOMETHING RIGHT? OH MY FLYING PANCAKES that must be a real miracle! ;u; You guys made me smile. I'm happy to know that most of you like what my doodling had become, even if I drifted away from the reason that you probably watched me for: badly drawn moe stuff~

I haven't replied because I sincerely have no words, and I'd rather stare at the comments in my inbox and giggle to myself like the demented invertebrate I am. Ask my mom, I'm so slouch you could say I lack a spinal chord.

Aaaah, I hope you're all having a fantastic week, at least a better week than me.
Remember the last drawing where I told you I had to do 150 drawings? I finished most of them but when I got to class I was told they were all wrong so I had to start from zero and I suddenly lost all my interest, and all the fucks I was going to give just... flew away. They buzzed out of the window and now I'm scarce of fucks to give. Sorry, teacher. 

I have been noticing dA is a lonelier place now. Is it just me? I miss the good old times where I could offer kiribans and stuff. My next kiriban will be when I reach a million views or something. That way I won't have to bother about it in the next... few years. And I miss livestreaming. I promise a livestreaming session soon. I'll die without one.

And most of all, I miss drawing for pleasure and having to do it as a homework. It sucks bad. bad bad bad. I may be the weird one that doesn't like it, but I certainly don't. Sigh. 

Wheee, a long journal in months! Do I get a badge? 

...See you guys around!

  • Mood: Peaceful
  • Listening to: The Papet Kites
  • Reading: Biophysics articles
  • Watching: Dexter
  • Playing: Candy Crush
  • Eating: Nope. Hungry.
  • Drinking: watercolors

Dark Dawn

Journal Entry: Sun Aug 18, 2013, 7:04 PM
Guess who became a featured author in MangaMagazine! Yeap, you're right! This Lea here did.
And thus, having people reading Dark Dawn in MM gives you (and me) some benefits!

1. If I manage to bring enough readers to the site, I may get some earnings! Earnings will mean an actual reason of weight to keep the comic going, as they mean more materials for my studies, investment in adds and supplies. Therefore, better quality in the pages when I switch to traditional, which I plan to do soon!

2. More readers mean more earnings which would mean more pages which mean more readers and so on. It's a cycle. More readers = more pages per week!

3. The stttoooorrrreee! Yes, they have a store! So I can upload items for sale and, when I get enough pages, even a Dark Dawn book! 

Okay I know I'm overreacting but I still think it's really cool so I'm letting you guys know.

For now, update schedule is sometime Wednesdays. In-between updates may come up, but Wednesday will always have its own page!

...I need a decent journal skin.

  • Mood: Optimism
  • Listening to: Buy the Stars
  • Reading: non-newtonian fluids&#039; articles
  • Watching: Attack on Levi--- on titan, I mean.
  • Playing: With Cornstarch and water
  • Eating: Candy. mentally. Too much candy crush
  • Drinking: Strawberry juice

24-ish hour notice

Journal Entry: Thu Aug 8, 2013, 9:29 PM
I'm doing a gallery clean up. Tomorrow I'll store and scrap all the deviations I don't like, or I don't feel like looking at anymore.
Not necessarily the oldest ones (I like to keep those up so I can see myself improving even if slightly), but the pointless ones. 

So, if you really like something I've submitted, this is the time for... I don't know. Looking at it for a last time? Saving it? Or... something....

I hold these clean ups every once in a while, and some other artists do too. I'm announcing it because, when I have an artist I like store stuff without notice I get sad that I can't see the work anymore and I wish I could have at least saved it to stare at it again. I doubt I'll get rid of anything you'll like to see again, but just being cautious. :>

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Hitomi Takahashi
  • Reading: non-newtonian fluids&#039; articles
  • Watching: Breaking Bad/ SNK
  • Playing: Candy Crush
  • Eating: Eren&#039;s mom
  • Drinking: the souls of the innocent


Journal Entry: Thu Aug 1, 2013, 9:30 AM
I deleted all my notes again, accidentally.


I want to cry. 

  • Mood: Regretful
  • Listening to: The Wallflowers
  • Reading: articles on ecophysiology
  • Watching: Breaking Bad
  • Playing: Candy Crush
  • Eating: weird japanese cherry candy
  • Drinking: tears

Just think about it

Journal Entry: Thu Jul 18, 2013, 8:37 PM
I know it's not an exact analogy, but I came to realize that every time someone watches me, it's like you're in an expo and see my stand and like it enough to ask for my card or even give me your address to send you a new drawing every time I draw one. And I have more than 8,000 watchers. I know that like only 10% are active but still, that's like more than 8,000 people thinking "hey this is rad I wanna see more", and around a hundred seeing a work I post and thinking "hey this thing, I like this thing, it makes me feel something somehow so Imma add it to a collection to see it again sometime/to show the crazy person behind it that I liked it."

And man, that's pretty much the happiest thing I have ever achieved in my life. I didn't manage to make anyone around me happy except for my parents, because I was a nerd and I got good grades home, but my classmates kinda didn't like me much. So now that I think of it it's... like... man. It's so many people. And some even bother to tell me stuff, like, to talk to me, and that's the more intriguing thing ever because I know how hard it is to tell someone that you like stuff they made.

Just, like, after 13 hours of class and a coffee overdose, I think I start thinking about life and shit and I feel thankful and even though I'm not like any internet celebrity or whatever, I realize I would have never, ever, expected to create such impact around me. I'm startled and feel unworthy because I hardly ever have time to reply to comments anymore, even though I used to do it the first dA years... And of course because I draw for fun and I usually don't put that much effort to anything I draw and thus, people liking it despite my laziness is... unfair.

But whatever. I just want to thank you all for your support and your comments and favs and stalks, and I want to apologize for never having time to compensate all the undeserved love I get. Thank you. ;3;

Caffeined!Lea out.

  • Mood: Awestruck
  • Listening to: The Fray
  • Reading: Sherlock Holmes
  • Watching: Shaman King
  • Playing: Candy Crush
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Juice

News News News 1, 2, 3, 4, 5!

Journal Entry: Sat Jul 6, 2013, 11:52 AM
So long no talk! I hope everyone is doing just fine!

Meanwhile, in Lealand, there be trouble. :iconhiems-mansion:'s supergroup subscription has ran out and now it's plain and deviantGray. D: Noes! What a calamity! Also, I'm redoing Dark Dawn (that old crappy thing I did 2 years ago? yeah) and uploading it for everyone to read!

First issue first.
I have 201 points in my power (muwahaha) but that won't be enough, as I can recall it's about 5000 to upgrade the subscription.
I don't have time (nor tablet) for commissions right now so I'll relay on kind donations and pity-- I mean, yeah, only kind donations.

Eventually I'll feel really guilty and will end up drawing something as a big thank you... Till that time comes, I'll put up a donation pool in my profile so feel free to pass by and laugh at me--- I mean, and donate.

Dark Dawn! Remember that piece of crap I did when I drew half assed moe kyun anime with huge heads and disproportionate bodies? Oh wait I still do that. What I wanted to say is that I'm fixing the storyline and the art, hopefully, so it's not a pain to read. 

You can find it in Smackjeeves (that will be uploading slowly, a page per day or so so I don't run out of pages too fast) and in MangaMagazine, where I accidentally uploaded most available pages so whoops? I didn't know I couldn't schedule? Hehehee...
Thus, the first chapter is ready for you to read... 8D;

I'm also updating SRS! Same, until I run out of pages...

Srsthingy by Leaglem

"Run out of pages, you say?"
Well yeah. If you haven't guessed yet, I broke my tablet and I'm drawing in my sister's, which is like twice as big and my shoulder can't really handle it (I still try in my naivety, hoping that my muscles will grow stronger), so it's a matter of time that I end up uploading all the available pages before I can continue with more. 

I'm so broke so broke so broke ahaha And I'm still trapped in university. Who the heck chooses to study two things. Like, who. that's 10 frigging years worth of university. At least here where careers take 5 years each. The fuck, Lea. Whatever, I'm a good nerd and I love studying so debts, come! Be welcome, you blood suckers!

I'm looking for a programmer who's interested in a long-ish term business. Flash, HTML, stuff for android and whatnot. Not urgent but it'd be nice to know people who are interested~ 

That's all folks, see you next time I decide to show my face to the internet!

  • Mood: I Have To Pee
  • Listening to: Ashlee Simpson
  • Reading: THGTTG
  • Watching: House, again
  • Playing: With the Pou thing in my new phone
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Pink lemonade

srfsdghjgsdjfgj Thank you for the birthday wishes

Journal Entry: Sat Jun 1, 2013, 9:55 AM
;U; Thank you so much! It was surprising to find my page crowded with beautiful messages and even gifts! Right now I'm about to finish my semester and that's why I couldn't be here for my birthday and check out all the joy here. I'll check out all the lovely gifts and comments! >v< I think I'll also do a short livestream (cough not procrastinating) in some hours so we can chat and stuff. 

I spent my birthday watching Hannibal and playing piano, and yesterday I went to a necropsy. Guys, it's the coolest thing ever, cutting people open and taking out organs--- Okay I shut up. It smells like crap, though.

And I got the news that I'll need like $12k to continue studying what I want to, and I don't even know anymore and I don't think commissions will make it, and I don't want my parents to overdo it. I'm a little filthy worm nurturing on my progenitors' <s>blood</s> sweat. Any ideas? Would you buy artbooks made by me? Should I try and publish graphic novels by my own? Should I get one of those "donate" buttons? I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE. I don't want to live on people's work and charity... Why is nobody willing to pay for drawing classes in my city? ahahaa.... whyamIsolazy...

Again, you guys rule! Here are my gifts so far ;u;u;u;u;u;u;

:thumb374938356::thumb373635557:Phillip by stephaniescarletHBD Leaglem by CJsuxThe Badly-Sewn Flesh Plushie and the Scarecrow by ArtsyAicaInnocent Look - HBD Lea ! by KimidollP H I L by deni-maize

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Hayashibara Megumi
  • Reading: So many articles
  • Watching: House MD
  • Eating: too much
  • Drinking: Pink lemonade

I give up on messages

Journal Entry: Wed Apr 24, 2013, 9:49 PM
I give up on notes and comments. I've tried to reply to most but heck no, I can't and I'm sorry! Please, don't you ever think I'm in any way ignoring you or I'm too damn smug to reply to you! I just don't have time, and I proved that I can't cope with my offline world and messages all along. When I get home, I'd rather doodle a bit, and so that little while is used in my relaxation rather than replying to messages...

Yeah, I feel guilty about it but I'd certainly rather keep my sanity. Sorry, sorry, sorry!

And sorry for the Lorax spam ahahaa;;;;; ohgoshsorry... I'll go hide in my Lerkim a corner.

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: myself, failing at guitar
  • Reading: The Hitchhiker&#039;s Guide to the Galaxy
  • Watching: Hotarubi no mori e ( :A: amg no )
  • Eating: arepa
  • Drinking: bubble tea


Journal Entry: Sun Apr 7, 2013, 2:59 PM
  • Mood: Distressed
  • Listening to: Of Monsters and Men
  • Reading: What comes next
  • Watching: Hannibal
  • Eating: Pocky
  • Drinking: Mango juice


Journal Entry: Tue Apr 2, 2013, 1:43 PM
I'll color a piece already in process and perhaps paint something else if I finish. Wanna come and chat? Follow this link!

If you don't know what a Stream is, it's a site where you can watch my screen and see what I do in real time while we chat. It's also the only thing I get things done fast, tehe... :>

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Whatever you want me to
  • Reading: What comes next
  • Watching: My eyebags grow
  • Eating: Meat.
  • Drinking: Mango juice

Thank you!

Journal Entry: Mon Mar 25, 2013, 11:52 AM
Thanks for all the watches, and favorites and beautiful comments that I haven't been able to reply! I'm sorry that my time is so limited, but I want you to know that I appreciate each and every one of them, and that they make me smile and keep trying to improve. Thanks, really!

For those who haven't seen it, I uploaded a base for the jumping icons so you can make your own! I've seen some already and they're lovely~
Jumping icon base by Leaglem

About me? Pretty much the same. Pulverizing bones to dust so we can take out genetic material for analysis. I've also worked in Code Hope, mostly on the story because I suck at programming. D: But the project will come out eventually, even if not part of Farway Studio, so wait for it! :>

Uh, how about I feature here some art? In your comment, leave the thumb (the number between ::s that appears just below the favorite link in each deviation) and I'll add them to the journal!

Love you, guys! :la:

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Of Monsters and Men
  • Reading: Endometriosis articles
  • Watching: Jesse suffer---- I mean, Breaking Bad
  • Eating: Melted gummy bears and Pocky
  • Drinking: Mango juice

Update on life

Journal Entry: Sun Mar 10, 2013, 8:42 AM
Hi people!

I haven't been able to come much lately, so I apologize for unreplied comments (cough and notes cough). I'm still working on commissions, which should be ready for the end of this month (unless you have set an earlier deadline).

Just so you know, I'm working in a lab, a forensic genetics lab, and it's really cool so far. Most of us here are artist, but if any of you ever had that dream of going around in a white lab coat and gloves and protective glasses and stuff, and solving mysteries and getting the bad guy on jail, well, it's pretty much that. Dunno about you, but I daydreamed with that since high school. elementary, I wanted to be an astronomer, hohoho...

Whatever. Just to let you know my life is okay though unspeakably busy, so I won't come around as often, but I won't forget about you either. I hope you're doing awesome!

Cheers and hugs and all that pink stuff!

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Regina Spektor
  • Reading: Endometriosis articles
  • Watching: Jesse suffer---- I mean, Breaking Bad
  • Eating: Eggs
  • Drinking: Aguapanela